


A dying dove

by Missmadhatter96



Series: Incomplete Phone Drabbles [1]
Category: Bleach
Genre: AU, Alternative Universe-Canon Divergence, Drabble, Emotional Hurt, Fully hollow Ichigo, Incomplete, Multi, Rape/Non-con Elements, fem!ichigo - Freeform, gender swap, mentally unstable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:13:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24410380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missmadhatter96/pseuds/Missmadhatter96
Summary: Non con. Ichigo gets captured by Aizen, forced into experimentation of her hollow. She finally cracks and gives in.Incomplete! I’m just posting some drabbles I have on my phone. I) is italics B) is bold. Unedited. Welcomed to take story and make own.
Relationships: Grimmjow Jaegerjaques/Kurosaki Ichigo, Hollow Ichigo & Kurosaki Ichigo, Kurosaki Ichigo & Zangetsu
Series: Incomplete Phone Drabbles [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1762807
Kudos: 24





	A dying dove

She screamed and screamed, pain ripping through her core on every push, every pull, tearing her soul to pieces. She swore if-when she got out of here she’d rip anyone who dared to touch her again to shreds. Her inner spirits seconding her resolve. Ichigo honestly would be much more insane if she didn’t have them to speak to. Yeah it was hell seeing their wielder like this, but they just have to pull through. Pick up the pieces later.

Another lined up and her hollow side snapped in with the injection the scientist gave her earlier. Reiatsu dark, her eyes glowing gold with black sclera. An inhuman growl ripped past her bloodied spilt lips, warning lower hollows away with another burst of reiatsu. Clapping sounded to her left. -Aizen. 

She was going to rip his dick off and shove it down his throat. Zangetsu snarling in her mind.

“I knew you’d give in to the hollow, Ichigo-chan. Become who you were meant to be. -My cero Espada.” He moved her orange sweat soaked strands from her left eye, seeing her hollow stigma forming under her golden eyes.

She hissed, I)“Never.” Spitting bloody saliva in his smug face.

He sighed, wiping the spit from his face slowly. Anger brewing in his cold hazel eyes. “A pity.” He raised a hand giving a quick circular motion to wrap this up and left through steel double doors. Szayel injected another drug, this one burning through her veins.

Ichigo screamed once more before embracing darknesses grasp.

  
-

  
There were hands on her wrists. No. No nononono. I)Don’t touch me!-

“Hey, hey. It’s just me. Just me.” Zangetsu held her wrists almost to the point of bruising in her motion to attack him.

She sighed, bone deep exhaustion hitting her once the adrenaline wore off from trying to protect herself. Her eyes instantly started tearing up once she remembered what happened.

Zangetsu pulled her to his pale chest along with a thin sheet from the too small mattress, shushing her sobs. “It’ll be alright, queen. Just rest for now.”

  
-

  
The next time alertness came back to her she gazed up into steel greenish eyes looking down at her with worry lining his blond brow. “Thank goodness,” Kisuke reached up to his ear, “I have her, medical treatment required. Kurosaki-san can you walk?” She shook her head, they broke her legs when testing yesterday and her instant regeneration hadn’t kicked in yet. “Alright.” Kisuke grabbed the sheet and wrapped it around her naked form more securely, gently lifting her in his arms.

Zangetsu screamed in her mind, trying to hold the pain at bay for her. His queen shouldn’t have to suffer anymore. Ichigo whimpered and closed her golden eyes to the false sunlight of Los Noches. She hadn’t been out of that god awful lab in months. In the back of her mind she wondered if this was just Aizen’s Zanpakuto playing tricks on her; trying to give false hope in this hopeless realm. But she hadn’t seen his release, they should be okay. She prayed this wasn’t just another illusion. -Please let this be real.-

  
-

  
Urahara glanced down at his quarry, she was so light now. He could feel her ribs and spine digging into his arm. Kisuke swore he’d kill Aizen for this. Beihime sung her fury in their inner world, singing for that bastards blood.

Ichigo whimpered when he shifted her. Her wrists were deep purple with old yellowing bruises lining the newer ones, her sword hand looked to have been broken repeatedly and never set properly. He swallowed the lump building in his throat. -She’s just a child. Why would anyone do this?-

She most likely had been taken against her will. If anyone was allowed close to her after this he’d be surprised.

They’d have to look after her, make sure nothing took hold.

The camp site came into view over the white dunes, the fourth already set up for treatment with captain of the sixth on guard with his squad.

Urahara stiffened at the weight of Espada level reiastu on his shoulders. I)The camp was right there!

It was the blue haired one, Grimmjow, if his memory served him right. Hand resting on his sword hilt, a lazy grin stretched his face flashing sharp teeth.

His voice rumbled low, “I’m suppose to stop ya. But what that bastard did...I won’t follow his orders anymore.” Grimmjow growled out. He must care deeply for Ichigo. Urahara thought.

“Does that mean you’re letting us go? As you can see I have my hands full. And I was never good at juggling.” He joked, trying to defuse the tension between them.

Grimmjow hummed, kicking sand idly. “If I can help protect her, then yes, I’m letting you go.”

That shocked Kisuke. An Arrancar wanting to protect a shinigami? But, she wasn’t just a shinigami and they both knew that.

“Very well. But harm a single hair on her head and I will personally see to you’re execution.”

Grimmjow held both hands up. “Easy, I was protecting her from half his bullshit before you showed up.”

Kisuke gave up trying to figure out the blue haired hollow and just flash stepped the rest of the way, Grimmjow hot on his heels.

  
-

  
She felt warm for once in what felt like forever, curled up tightly to another warm body. Wait.

She bolted from the soft warm bed in panic, breathing fast and hard trying to form a cero in her hand before they were slammed into the ground along with her body. She screamed in fear and panic, what will they do now? Oh god I can’t take that again...

“Queeny! Hey! It’s just me. It’s okay, yer not there anymore. It’s okay.” Zangetsu kept muttering reassurance to her softly, making sure she knew it was over, they got out. They’re safe.

“Z-Zangetsu?” Ichigo whispered, sitting up with her hollows help, long orange strands fell into her eye when she leaned her forehead to his chest, breathing evening out. “Wha-? Where are we...? What’d they do?!” Her panic coming back tenfold when she felt her stomach. A low pulse of reiastu resting against her palm. God she was gonna be sick. Her face paled to almost match her inner spirit.

“Kisuke!” Zangetsu’s distorted voice echoed in the room. He spun his wielder around so her back was to his chest, forearms held up so she wouldn’t hurt herself.

She shrieked at the way he held her, unfortunately bringing a forgotten memory to the surface in her panic. Her eyes grew wide when another body entered the room. Nonono! Not again please!

“Ichigo-“

“Nononono!” Her struggles grew in intensity when he drew closer, settling a open palm to her forehead.

“Shhh.. it’s going to be okay. You’re safe now.” Kisuke casted the kido silently, her tense body growing limp instantly. Kisuke sighed, running a hand through his hair. “How bad is it in there?” He knew Zangetsu would answer, Ichigo had been very open to him about her inner world whenever she felt down, telling him the changes and asking if every shinigami was the same.

“Drowning. She’s slipping through my fingers, Kisuke. I’m scared.” Tears silently spilled from his gold gaze. Would she ever be alright? What could he do to help more? He’d already healed all he could with the healers help. He loved her so much. So so much. Zangetsu pulled her to sit cradle in his arms, resting her head in the crook of his neck, cheek resting atop silky strands.

He startled when a warm hand gently ran through his long pale hair, he matched his wielder in everything, looking up at Kisuke. No one dared lay a hand on another’s Zanpakuto spirit but Urahara was the exception. “She’s very strong, Zangetsu, and so are you. She’ll need you most during the healing.”

“But you felt the-“

“I’ll have Unohana take care of it. Rest for now, no one here can or will harm you two.”

Zangetsu watched Urahara as he shut the rooms door without a sound. Despite his reassurance of no one will hurt them, Zangetsu still stayed alert while his wielder rested. They were still stuck in bankai, his slim fitting robe torn at the ends. He didn’t wanna see their sword. The bastard had broken him during a fight and Ichigo never had the strength to mend them afterwards.

If he ever saw that smug bastard again Zangetsu was going to rip him to shreds.

-

I-You see now? You have to, it is you’re destiny to become the Cero Espada. I will find you again. It will become one with you while I’m away.

Until then...

Ichigo woke up screaming, clawing bloody lines on her throat. She was drenched in a cold sweat. Sometime during the night Zangetsu had moved her to the bed, the covers thrown from her slim frame in her restlessness.

He pulled his wields fingers from her throat, the wounds healing instantly. Whatever they did had left her closer on the hollow scale, her cries close to the ones of hollow wails.

“Kurosaki-kun,” Unohana walked up to the other side of the bed and gently wiped her forehead of sweat. Ichigo’s black and gold eyes snapped to hers instantly, growling low in her chest. “Good, I have your attention at least. I am afraid what I have to say will startle you but I’m under the orders to tell you despite you’re emotional state.” Unohana said sadly. Couldn’t they wait longer? The child barely got back to Soul Society.

“Tell her what?” Zangetsu growled.

“The Soutaicho is planning on removal of Kurosaki-kuns womb and the uterus to stop further attempts of creating a child of considerable power.” Ichigo’s eyes were solely focused on her now, pain carefully hidden.

“No.”

“Queen-“

“No! I may not want this thing because of where it came from but it is my child! He can’t take them from me! He has no right-“ Her yells we’re cut off when Unohana placed a reiastu suppression collar around her neck. Zangetsu screamed, he lunged at Unohana but his form was ripped away back into their inner world before he could. Ichigo gasped and clawed at the collar with weakened strength.

“I am sorry, Kurosaki-kun. But it wasn’t an option, I am merely here to tell you what was to happen.” She hated this. Soul Society was truly corrupt if they don’t even bat an eye taking one thing every women held dearly.

  
-

  
Empty.

After she endured torture after tortuous deed that madman put her through?

This is what she got?

They indeed took her reproduction organs. She was as sterile as they came now...

Maybe her regeneration could regrow them? She highly doubted it.

Zangetsu was asleep in her mind along with Ossan. Would they think her less now that she couldn’t bring life into the worlds?

Shuffling grabbed her attention when a lower ranking officer came in, “Ah, you’re awake. Are you in pain?” She looked young but so did every shinigami, her hair a bob cut to hug her cheeks, a bright smile in place. Ichigo motioned her closer, closer...She moved too fast, Ichigo snapped the low rank shinigamis neck in a heartbeat.

She sat up, shoulders slumped. Hands limp either side of her hips. Tears running down paling cheeks.

Zangetsu stirred from his slumber and merged with her, donning their hollow form. Black bindings wrapped around her breasts, her cloak falling from her hips in dark red waves moving in an invisible wind. Red fur lined her wrists and ankles, hair lengthened past her waist and horns formed pointing foreword on either side of her head. A hollow hole dead center of her stomach.

How dare they.

Long sharp claws slashed down and the wall to outside exploded to splitters.

Stepping outside felt odd. It was night but the grass was too green, lamps too bright. City too quiet. Not for long.

  
-

  
“Warning! The Fourth division is under attack! Calling all available shinigami Lieutenant and higher! Vasto Lorde level reiastu headed for the Hakutōmon!”

Grimmjows ears perked up upon hearing the alarms ring. His cell at the sixth was alright. He only wish they’d give Pantera back to him.

The redhead from Hueco Mundo stormed in demanding answers like he knew what was happening better then they did. “Who else is here?!” Grimmjow shrugged a shoulder.

“Only other hollow here is Kurosaki. Unless you forgot.”

Renji knew he wouldn’t have answers but that’s not why he came to the ex-Espada anyway. “Come on, you’re helping her, right?” He opened the cell doors and handed the blue haired Arrancar his sword then flashed away. Does that mean he’s free?

Grimmjow took off in sonido to where the only hollows reiastu was. He knew it was Kurosaki, no one else from Hueco Mundo was this strong.

—

Rage.

So much rage. Such a strong emotion, anger was. Her stomach had a hollow hole in it. She remembered it being in the middle of her chest last time this happened. Why’d it change?

-B-“They changed you, Queen. Yer grief is fueling us along with other things...and now it’s in our stomach.” That should worry her but everything was underlined by the feeling of revenge. -Take what they took from you. (I

“Kurosaki!”

She paused in her slow walk through Seireitei. Ichigo hadn’t done anything but walked. No, far from that. Her reiastu was flattening any who dared too close and destroying buildings. Ripping the reishi buildings to shreds and absorbing them, adding to her strength.

“Grimm,” Ichigo’s voice held Zangetsu’s distortion, black streaks lined her cheeks much like Ulquiorras. Liked she’d been crying her soul out. “They haven’t killed you? We’ve missed you.” Ichigo held her arms open like she was waiting for a hug.

“What happened to ya?” He asked once he landed a few feet from her, weary.

Ichigo laughed not too sanely, “Oh, what has happened, indeed. They took it from me,” Her hands ghosted over her hollow hole in longing, “Everything. Why would they do that?” Grimmjow could see tears shining against the war streaks in the morning sunrise. She looked sad. Broken. Hollow.

“Took what?” Daring to step closer resulted in a long thin sword pointed at his throat in warning.

“My baby.” Ichigo whispered but he still caught it. His eyes widened when a shinigami appeared behind Ichigo. His warning yell fell on deaf ears. In what it took to blink, Kurosaki had slashed them in half, blood sprayed on her chest. She didn’t even have her sword.

“They keep trying to kill me!” Her sudden shouting startled Grimmjow, Ichigo right in his face breathing heavily, “But they can’t. Can’t even nick my clothes. Maybe you could? Yer strong like us. -Aizen made us.”

“The old you wouldn’t of wanted this done to her friends.”

“Friends!? What -friends?” Ichigo turned a tight circle, seething with renewed anger, “Heh, friends don’t take another’s baby without permission. Friends don’t forget about you for months on end then show back up like nothings wrong!” She slashed her hand down, a gap left in the stone by the force. “No, they help. I’ve been abandoned in my own home, Grimmjow, how would you act if the same happened to you?”

“Did they actually abandon you? It looked ta me like they were tryin’! They fought to take you back! Doesn’t that mean anything?”

Ichigo halted in her steps, narrow eyes glaring daggers at him.

“You have no idea what they’ve done...”

“Kurosaki-“ Grimmjow tried to grab her arm. Big mistake. Ichigo screamed and grabbed his throat in a death grip, lifting him a couple feet off the ground.

“Don’t touch me!” She threw him through a still standing wall, multiple walls that is. She hovered over him like she had been standing there the entire time. -B-“No one can touch me anymore.”

Grimmjow coughed up the dust from the rubble, looking up in fear. He hasn’t felt that in a very long time.

“Ichigo!” Rukia yelled as she landed, already in shikai and on defense. Must not trust her anymore.

Ichigo snarled. “Leave me alone.” She grabbed Grimmjows jacket and hauled him over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes and took off in a boom of sonido.

Wind whipped around the pair, Ichigo moved faster then anyone. She couldn’t think straight, everything was jumbled, fuzzy, wrong. She felt wrong.

Every little thing felt dull yet somehow magnified, the light, the way the trees swayed and leaves rustled, the grass crunching underneath her footfalls; the blue of the sky and the dirt under her claws. Blood staining her chest. The distant shouting of Rukongai residents.

Ichigo stopped walking, stopped breathing. Her reiastu thrummed under her bleached skin, holding her together. Is this what she wanted? To fight her friends? Old friends?

Were they ever friends in the beginning? Or had her sudden appearance just shocked everyone into false friendship? Trying to win this powerful young teen to their side early so no one else could tell them the people she had began to trust were actually the evil ones instead. Maybe only lesser evil. But still.

Grimmjow groaned in his position under a tree. The leafs shielding them from the warm summer sun. “I-I didn’t know. How to explain this,” Ichigo gestured at herself, “You wouldn’t understand. Is what I wanted to say, but, I think you would, considering...” She didn’t finish. She just half pointed at his own hollow hole. The exact place her’s is now.

“Heh, not entirely, no. Hollows don’t remember their deaths.” Grimmjow leaned forward on his knees. “They took yer child. I’m sorry.” He was apologizing?

She nodded hesitantly. “I’m afraid of turning back. I don’t think I’ll run out of energy to stay like this but I shouldn’t be a coward. My feelings...emotions...I can’t feel them that well like this. I-I should be able to face them.” Her voice felt small. “But I can’t.” Zangetsu was quiet. She wished he wasn’t. The smartass remarks would of been nice.

“Can you stay like this?” She had just said she probably could. Grimmjow wasn’t asking about spare reiastu, no. He was talking about the emotional toll. It may be easy now but it’s not a fixer, it just mutes them for a while. Like swept under the rug, sooner or later someone was going to pick that rug up.

“No. I s-shouldn’t.” A chill raced up her spine. Grimmjow didn’t see it coming but Kurosaki could sense it.

Ichigo’s sonido was fast enough to block the blade heading for Grimmjows spine. She growled in her chest. She’d marked her territory. This one was her’s.

He prided himself in good instincts but that was damn right close.

The captain of the second jumped back in hidden shock. Ichigo pushed him behind her and charged a cero between her horns.

Ichigo didn’t show mercy for the captain. She fired then jumped into sonido to unleashed a second cero with her hand where Soifon would appear next.

It tore through the captains shoulder, cutting her sword arm clean off. Ichigo reappeared behind her, thrusting her clawed hand like a spear through her heart.

“I-I knew...” Her words died in her throat, reiastu a flicker until it dimmed then died completely once her heart stopped.

Ichigo didn’t show remorse. She had hated Soifon since she’d showed up in Soul Society to save Rukia.

Grimmjow stood in shock at the display in violence. His hackles raised once Kurosaki landed in front of him. Would she kill him too even though she saved him?

There was blood smeared on her cheek. “We need to go.” Ichigo opened a garganta and hopped in. “C’mon!” Grimmjow didn’t think twice before following her, the entrance shut as soon as he stepped foot on the solid reishi path of Ichigo’s.

“Where we goin’?”

“To Urahara. He can hide us.”

  
-

  
“Kurosaki.”

“What.”

Grimmjow went to grab her arm to halt her steps, but his fingers barely grazed her and he jerked them back with a hiss, the tips of them burnt. She was running hotter than a live wire.

“You smell like that captain and if I remember right, Urahara’s best friend is friends with her. I don’t think they’ll help if she knows.”

Ichigo froze. Did I...?

“You tore Soifon apart.”

Why don’t I remember? What did they do to my head?!

She was starting to panic. Her pathway broke and crumbled. Grimmjow made his own and pulled her to his.

Ichigo jerked her arm free and in her panicked haze, gripped the ex-espadas throat.

“They didn’ do anythin’. You blocked it from your memory.” Zangetsu appeared beside Grimmjow, tightening his hand on her wrist to let him go.

She let go and took a shaky step back.

“Grimm helped Urahara to free us, Ichigo.”

“He was just another one lined up.”

“He wasn’t though. He stood guard and once the bastard left, he took care of us.”

“IT DOESN’T MATTER!” She screamed in his face.

The end of the garganta was close and she could hear Urahara call out for her worriedly.

Ichigo used sonido to escape.

Kisuke barely caught Ichigo in her haste.

“L-lemme go!” Why was she so tired now? She could hardly stand.

“Ichigo!” Grimmjow yelled for her once he exited the garganta.

Ichigo blinked, gold eyes hazy, her lids drooping. She slumped in Kisukes hold and fought the darkness trying to take over.

The two shared a look over the orangette before moving the teen inside the warded shop.

  
-

  
“Reiatsu exhaustion? That’s a thing?”

A hum. “Yes. Though Ichigo has always had a very deep reserve. No, I believe she just passed out due to overexerting herself and the recent stress of the...surgery.” Kisuke sipped at his cooling tea. “Rest and special food will help her.”

Grimmjow shifted to sit cross legged and leaned his elbows on the low rise table. “Will she though? In the garganta...she didn’t sound-“

“Sane?” Ichigo stepped from the hall to the backroom and sat on a cushion heavily. “We’re fine. I mean...no not really alright.” She sighed. “I-I’m not sure I’ll ever be okay again.” Ichigo dropped her gaze to her sweatpants clad lap, her sleeves of the soft oversized sweater pulled over her fingers. She twisted them together nervously.

Grimmjow huffed. She looked awful. Tired, worn down, drowning in sorrow and rage.

“You’re very strong Ichigo. You have friends to lean on, you are not in this alone.”

“Has any of them lost a child that I barely got to know? Has any of them been raped, tortured and pumped full of drugs repeatedly? No. They won’t understand.”


End file.
